Eighteen to look older...much older
I had an audition on Saturday for a horror movie called "Dead Stop". It was a cool situation as the director sat in on my acting class and called myself, Jeff and Mitch in direct to callbacks. So that was about as cool as it can get, other than just getting outright offered the part.
I was literally trapped in the Valley as I fought through insane traffic (my fault for not anticipating the rush hour-like traffic at 2:00 in the afternoon on a Saturday...what was I thinking?) and get to my 2:00 audition at around 2:30. Luckily they were very cool and were heading to lunch, so it gave me time to shake the road off and chill.
The casting director, director, AD and producer were all in the audition and they couldn't have been warmer or nicer. One of the ladies was convinced she saw me somewhere, so I offered that I had done some comedy spots on Comedy Central and she figured that was it. I don't think it was, but if she was convinced she knew me (and apparently I killed on this phantom set) I'm sure not going to argue with her.
I had a great read it was a lot of fun but the part I read for was for a young dude...we're talking 18-20 year old young. I mean, I look young and can pull off college aged if I have to...but that's with other people around my age who look young as well. Put me next to a REAL 18-year old and I look about 90! One of my lines was literally me being scared that my mom found out about the party I was having. As I was joking about this in the waiting room, the woman auditioning to play my Mother (who was only in her 40's so maybe if she had an accident at around 16, could possibly be my Mom) asked how old I really was.
"I can't tell you that, but I can tell you that I'm pretty much past the point of worrying that my Mom is going to catch me having a party."
Jeff and I were in tears laughing about this after the audition. Imagine if we book this? I can just hear the reviews:
"I loved it, but I don't understand why those two old guys wanted to hang around with those kids. That was kind of creepy. And why was that dude so worried about his Mom finding out about the party? He should just get his own place and then he wouldn't have to worry about it. I mean, the guy's like fifty already, it's about time he moved out."
At least I didn't pull the cardinal sin of trying to act much younger. "Hey, um, dawgs did you guys catch the...uh...pop culture reference...last night. How about that Snoops Dog. He's the bomb, right? Isn't he? You know, still the bomb? Don't we say that anymore?"
Jeff and I came up with a whole scenario of us bursting into the casting office with baggy cargo shorts and skateboards: "Yeah we had to skate here. Because we don't have licenses yet. You know, to drive. Because we're really young. Too young to have licenses. Pretty young."
Well, I may or may not get the part but I had a good audition and will most likely get called back for another project. At least I got a few good laughs out of it.
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