Tales from the background: Episode III
OK I think this is going to be my last report from the set of "Mr. Woodcock".
The shoot seemed to go really well, albeit the director did like nine takes of every scene. Plus rehearsals. I played Whac-a-Mole for about 3 hours straight...I think I got carpal tunnel. The worst part about it was that due to the noise, they couldn't actually turn on the game during the scene. So I had to "pretend" to play Whac-a-Mole. There was this large man next to me that apparantly didn't have the stamina for such a grueling effort. Around the 3:00 AM hour he stopped pretending at all. He just would pick up the mallet and let it fall. At one point he just stood there and fell asleep. Standing up. Very impressive.
There was this one kid who I guessed to be 22, but looked like he was 12. He was mouthing off to these two girls about how he likes to date "fat chicks". "Sure they cost more to feed," proclaimed Don Juan, "but they are so desperate and lonely that I can get right in there". I have no idea where "right in there" may be on the female body but I do have a sneaking suspicion that this kid ain't had p**** since p**** had him.
But I bit my lip. Until, he started talking about the Red Sox....
He said that it's bogus that the All Star Game dictates home field advantage in the World Series, and had it not, St. Louis would have beaten the Sox.
I had to call "Bullshit".
I couldn't take anymore and lit into him. "Um, that's all fine and good but the Sox SWEPT St. Louis. And two of the games, including the one where they WON THE WORLD SERIES was in St. Louis." He was finally forced to the "I bet the whole thing was rigged" argument.
Oh yeah, Einstein. That conspiracy along with your expansive treatise on fat chicks has unlocked all of the secrets of the universe.
I get cranky at 4 AM.
<< Home